How to tell who got F9 in a subject at school
In Maths
She wants to stock sugar in her house because of the looming economic meltdown so she figures she will be saving some money if she bought it at Nakumatt, Game or Uchumi at 3,000/= per kg because sugar in Mengo has hit 5,000/- per kg (approximately). She gets a special hire and moves from one supermarket to another to be able to accumulate 6 kgs “anti” the supermarkets are rationing their sugar output. At the end of it all, she pays the special hire man 20,000/- and puts a very satisfied smile on her face
Breaking it down for her: 5,000 by 6 equals 36,000 and 3,000/- by 6 equals 18,000/- then add 20,000/- and you get a whooping 38,000/- . This one was getting below 10% seriously.
In History
She has been dating a player for the whole year, she gets tired of his crap and dumps him, in comes John; player number two, after six months, her heart is broken again. She can’t seem to understand why relationships are not working out for her. She gives it one last shot with Frank, two months down the road and she’s crying herself to sleep. If only she had attended her history lesson with an alert brain, then she would have known that history repeats itself, difference is; you gotta learn from the past to make a better decision in the future! That’s how it works honey.
In Chemistry
You take her out on a date or go clubbing, you wanna have fun coz its freaky Friday, all your buddies are there and that special liquid is flowing like manna from heaven. She doesn’t do alcohol so she is chilling on a Bambucha. However her uptight presence is starting to get on your nerves and you suggest a punch for her. She refuses and goes like “mixing drinks is dangerous” come on! This is what happens when you go to the chemistry lab as a tourist Vs as a student. Reality check here; you have been drinking mixed drinks all your life e.g. water plus milk equals tea, water plus quencher equals juice, simple chemistry there; Every bwat that made it past Bunsen burners knows that bambucha plus UG equals happiness.
In Geography
She’s been nagging to visit you for two months now and you’ve run out of excuses so you give her directions to your gwan. Get a taxi to Wandegeya, get out near Barclays Bank, walk towards the Post office, continue towards JB hostel, branch to your right after JB hostel, move through the narrow corridor till you find a lady selling charcoal, ask the charcoal lady where Kalisa’s garage is, when you get there turn left and walk to where the big Jambula tree is, turn right and continue upwards, you will see two houses by the road, the first one is mine. Simple isn’t it? She says yes, she’ll be there in 40. 30 minutes later your katorch is singing “ring ring ani oyo” you pick and it’s an Angella in distress, stuck at JB hostel! It will be a miracle if she ever hit above 32% in geography.
In English
You meet him and say hi, he says “Good morning” what’s so good about the morning you ask yourself, I mean it’s been raining cats and dogs; you’re freezing and shivering like a leaf and to top it all up it’s a Monday. Then you ask him “so what’s up?” he looks at the sky and thinks for a second and this is his thoughtful reply “I can only see clouds” please! Really!
In Economics
He follows every word of 50 cent religiously, so he believes its either get rich or die trying. Getting rich has completely failed to launch in his life whatsoever, so he figures its better to get a loan from the standard chattered bank and live the good life. He uses the loan to pay rent for a bungalow, buy a new car plus take his newly acquired campus queen bee with her entire click to Serena for dinner. Eh! Seriously people, this dude lacks even the basics of introduction to economics.
She wants to stock sugar in her house because of the looming economic meltdown so she figures she will be saving some money if she bought it at Nakumatt, Game or Uchumi at 3,000/= per kg because sugar in Mengo has hit 5,000/- per kg (approximately). She gets a special hire and moves from one supermarket to another to be able to accumulate 6 kgs “anti” the supermarkets are rationing their sugar output. At the end of it all, she pays the special hire man 20,000/- and puts a very satisfied smile on her face
Breaking it down for her: 5,000 by 6 equals 36,000 and 3,000/- by 6 equals 18,000/- then add 20,000/- and you get a whooping 38,000/- . This one was getting below 10% seriously.
In History
She has been dating a player for the whole year, she gets tired of his crap and dumps him, in comes John; player number two, after six months, her heart is broken again. She can’t seem to understand why relationships are not working out for her. She gives it one last shot with Frank, two months down the road and she’s crying herself to sleep. If only she had attended her history lesson with an alert brain, then she would have known that history repeats itself, difference is; you gotta learn from the past to make a better decision in the future! That’s how it works honey.
In Chemistry
You take her out on a date or go clubbing, you wanna have fun coz its freaky Friday, all your buddies are there and that special liquid is flowing like manna from heaven. She doesn’t do alcohol so she is chilling on a Bambucha. However her uptight presence is starting to get on your nerves and you suggest a punch for her. She refuses and goes like “mixing drinks is dangerous” come on! This is what happens when you go to the chemistry lab as a tourist Vs as a student. Reality check here; you have been drinking mixed drinks all your life e.g. water plus milk equals tea, water plus quencher equals juice, simple chemistry there; Every bwat that made it past Bunsen burners knows that bambucha plus UG equals happiness.
In Geography
She’s been nagging to visit you for two months now and you’ve run out of excuses so you give her directions to your gwan. Get a taxi to Wandegeya, get out near Barclays Bank, walk towards the Post office, continue towards JB hostel, branch to your right after JB hostel, move through the narrow corridor till you find a lady selling charcoal, ask the charcoal lady where Kalisa’s garage is, when you get there turn left and walk to where the big Jambula tree is, turn right and continue upwards, you will see two houses by the road, the first one is mine. Simple isn’t it? She says yes, she’ll be there in 40. 30 minutes later your katorch is singing “ring ring ani oyo” you pick and it’s an Angella in distress, stuck at JB hostel! It will be a miracle if she ever hit above 32% in geography.
In English
You meet him and say hi, he says “Good morning” what’s so good about the morning you ask yourself, I mean it’s been raining cats and dogs; you’re freezing and shivering like a leaf and to top it all up it’s a Monday. Then you ask him “so what’s up?” he looks at the sky and thinks for a second and this is his thoughtful reply “I can only see clouds” please! Really!
In Economics
He follows every word of 50 cent religiously, so he believes its either get rich or die trying. Getting rich has completely failed to launch in his life whatsoever, so he figures its better to get a loan from the standard chattered bank and live the good life. He uses the loan to pay rent for a bungalow, buy a new car plus take his newly acquired campus queen bee with her entire click to Serena for dinner. Eh! Seriously people, this dude lacks even the basics of introduction to economics.
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